OPEN LETTERS

Open Letter to My Mother’s Wooden Urn

Thanks for helping me be emotionally independent

Mark Tulin
4 min readNov 10, 2021

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Photo by the author, Mark Tulin

Dear Mom ( who now resides in a wooden urn),

I hope you’ve found a better existence somewhere else in the universe because the one you had on Earth wasn’t too hot. You had to deal with schizophrenia for most of your adulthood. Your father died when you were young, your mother was emotionally distant, your brother was a narcissist, your sister was a country club snob, and your husband was a womanizer.

And I was a difficult child to raise.

I was a mischief-maker, a smart ass, and talked back to you at every opportunity. I felt entitled because I was the only man in the house, with my father living upstate and coming home on random weekends.

But despite all of our hardships, I want to pay homage. First and foremost, I honor your parenting style after years of seeing enmeshed and overinvolved parents as a family therapist. Second, you allowed me to be emotionally independent. Third, you helped me to be self-sufficient.

You might wonder how you did that. Well, I’ll outline it for you.

You stepped back and allowed me to make mistakes.

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Mark Tulin

I escaped a therapy career to follow a dream. Poetry/Humor/Sexuality/Doodler/Storyteller — https://crowonthewire.com